Jesus is Worth It!
The past week has been a little crazy. I wrapped up my first year of teaching, my sister got married, and I have officially started my mini tour of the States (Georgia, Alabama, Texas, Indiana and California). This has been the first quiet moment I've had to sit and process this insane and incredible year. I was going to do a recap of the highs and lows of this year, but as I sit and think, I can only remember how amazing this journey has been, how much fun I have had, how the Lord has worked in my life and the joy and fulfillment I have found.
It is puzzling to me that we think that our plans are better than God's plans, that what we desire for ourselves is better than what God-who knit us together, sees our comings and goings, and knows our innermost being-desires for us. When I think about how I resisted the Lord's voice drawing me to Bogotá, I am so relieved that I was obedient. Of the MANY things the Lord has taught and shown me this year, I have come to understand that God truly does know my heart better than I do and He truly does have good plans for us and in following Him there is eternal joy and true contentment.
I would like to give a "brief" (I'll try to be brief...but no promises) overview of the Lord's work since I moved to Colombia and I pray that this testimony offers encouragement and conviction to those of you who are reading this. I've noticed that I have tendency to write my blogs in numbered list form and I think that I shall continue the tradition in this post.
1. God equips the ones He calls---I've heard this many times before, I believe that this is a true statement and now I have experienced God's equipping power firsthand. When I tell you that I have no idea what I am doing as a teacher, I actually have no idea. People would ask "why teaching" over and over when I first announced that I was moving to Colombia and the honest answer was "I have no clue!" I had no desire to teach, in fact I changed my major from education after two years of college because I was absolutely sure that I did not want to teach. But after trying for a long time to do things on my own, I did have a desire to follow the Lord wherever He decided to take me. My first semester was rough; I didn't magically know exactly how to plan well or do classroom management well or how to love my students well. What I did know was that I was going to need help and I was going to need to be strengthened by the Lord. I knew that He called me to El Camino for a purpose and that He would enable me to fulfill it. I remained teachable and I asked questions and I sought the Lord and by second semester I had a much better grip on teaching. I am still not great by any stretch of the imagination, but I can see how God has equipped me by surrounding me with experienced teachers who are willing to help me. He has given me (and all of us) a spirit of strength that pushed me to improve and take risks and to be ok with failing (a lot). Being equipped doesn't always mean that we know exactly what we are doing, but trusting God that He will show us what to do when the time comes.
2. God is a good teacher---There is so much to learn about who God is and how He works and how to best fulfill His purpose for us here on earth and it can be overwhelming. The good news is, however, that God is the epitome of a good teacher. He is patient and kind, He disciplines justly and with mercy and grace. He is not put out by our questions or annoyed when we don't understand. He is full of compassion and will do whatever it takes for us to learn the lesson He is teaching us. Even if it hurts, He knows the end result for us is good and He walks us through the pain. I can't tell you how many times God has to repeat Himself to me because I wasn't listening or I didn't trust His goodness and wisdom. But every time I come back, He greats me with gentleness and a loving hand that guides me through the lesson again and again until it goes from head-knowledge to heart-knowledge. What an incredible God we serve!
3. Contentment is found in Christ alone---This is something that I have really struggled with my whole life. I have always been looking for something more or better to give me peace and contentment. This year, in particular, the past few months, I have been intentional about really being content. And as Paul reminds us, the secret to contentment in all circumstances, is Jesus Christ. As I have studied God's word and come to understand exactly what it means to be content in knowing Jesus, I have realized that Jesus is worth everything we can offer Him. Jesus is better than anything we could possibly have here on earth because He is forever and His. love, goodness, mercy and grace last forever. In Him there is ETERNAL pleasure meaning it never ends! His ways are perfect and He works all things together for our good. When I ponder all that Jesus is and what He has done to fix what I broke, how could I think that a certain job, a relationship, clothes or a certain lifestyle could bring me joy and contentment? All of those things are temporary and ever changing. They offer nothing but demand everything. Jesus freely offers us everything and makes no demands in return and because of that I desire to give Him my life and in Him I have found rest, joy and a contentment that is steady and sure.
I have to say that I am so grateful that God is not idle and continues to sanctify and teach us despite our defiance and stupidity!
I would like to leave you with one final thought and encouragement: The Lord is worth waiting on. Our temporary suffering is worth whatever the Lord is trying to show us and develop in us. Jesus is worth any step He asks us to walk outside of our comfort zone. He is perfect in all of His ways, so trust that He knows what He is doing in your life.